We will not be bent out of existence!

Can You Trust Your Elbows?

Conventional science may tell you that elbows are docile, subservient creatures—perhaps nothing more than a system of flesh and blood that you control with your mind. In this day in age, we know when we've been sold a bill of goods because dammit we feel it in our dicks! Don't listen to their siren song. Don't lull yourself into their deadly embrace!

Today is the day we fight back—the day we muzzle our elbows.

Here at Elbow Truth Stream, we're not going to brainwash you with the Wisdom of the Sheep. No, we speak truth so deep it pours out of us without cessation. We have exposed the Demon Arm Bumps humankind so tragically refers to as Elbows, as if these Satanic Hinge Boblins were a sort of beguiling arm mechanics.

Goodness, no! We stand on the precipice of disaster, as steep as the peak of the Incubus of the Folded Limb. We must subdue this alien life force taken root in our "elbows" to become the Barbarous Ogres of Appendage Knob.

Through the gracious gifts of Dr. Mala Dibyendu, we have a defense against Elboica Armillaria and hope for the human race. The Elbow Muzzle can save our species by sedating the parasite within. Using a special class of opioid derivatives—called Elbopioids—delivered through FleshHook™ Cannula, the Elbow Muzzle delivers safe respite from the plight of the Vile Fiends Humerus and Ulna.

Do you care about the safety of
you and your loved ones?

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